Talking Backwards
by fuzzyalligator
Summary: COMPLETE::Sirius has been hit by a spell that makes him talk backwards. What kind of trouble can he get into?
1. TAHW?

A/N: Hey, this is my third fic in 4 days. I've been really bored, can't ya tell? Hope you enjoy

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s –sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"Come on, guys," protested Remus Lupin. His friends were picking on Severus Snape again. This fight started like many did, for no reason. "Let's just get to class." He started to tug on Sirius Black's arm.

"Yeah, listen to your boyfriend," snarled Snape. Sirius pulled his arm free and lunged for Snape's neck, and both boys fell to the ground.

James Potter hurried over and pulled Sirius off of him. "Moony's right. Let's just get to class."

By now Remus and Peter Pettigrew had already left for class. "Why do they always do that?" asked Remus. Peter just shrugged his shoulders and they continued their way. They entered the classroom and took their seats.

Professor McGonagall walked to the front of the class and started he lecture on turning animals into inanimate objects. Peter looked around trying to spot the other Marauders. When he couldn't find them he tapped Remus on the arm. He looked at Peter who mouthed 'Where are they?'

Before Remus could answer the three missing boys showed up. Snape sat down and Remus noticed that he had an evil smile on his face. He looked at the other two but they were too busy 'taking notes', meaning passing notes.

McGonagall stared at the boys waiting for an explanation. When none came she addressed the boys. "Well. Would one of you mind telling me why you three were late?"

James and Sirius gave each other a look, James was going to say something when Snape interrupted him. "We were merely having a discussion about out Potions essay. We simply lost track of time." She looked at him with a raised eyebrow. She turned to the two Gryffindors, waiting for confirmation.

They both nodded. Without any evidence of foul play, McGonagall continued her lecture. All the while Remus was wondering what really happened.

--

When class ended, Remus and Peter hurried over to their friends.

"What happened?" asked Peter.

"We were walking away and Snivelus shouted a spell," replied James. "It hit Sirius, but nothing happened." To confirm this, all of them looked at him.

He just shrugged and opened his mouth to say something. But what came out was nonsense. "Epon. Gnihton."

The others just stared at him. "Tahw?"

Peter was the first to recover. "What did you say?"

"I dias: Epon. Gnihton."

"What was the spell that Sniv- I mean, Severus used?" asked a bewildered Remus.

"It was something like 'Serma Tragifersatin'" answered James.

"'Sermo Tergiversatio,' maybe?" Remus said.

Sirius nodded his head quickly and James said "YES!"

Remus hit James on the head. When Sirius laughed, he did it to him too. "Roughly translated, it means: Talk Backwards."

Peter asked, "What does that mean?"

Sirius raised his hand and waved it vigorously; everyone ignored him.

"That means," answered Remus, "That whatever Sirius says is said…backwards."

"What are we going to do about it?" James asked.

Remus sighed and said, "We cou-"

"YEH!" cried Sirius. They all looked at him. "M'i yrgnuh."

A collective "Huh" was his answer. He rolled his eyes and pointed to his stomach and then his mouth.

"I don't know what you're trying to say," confessed Peter. "But I'm hungry. Let's go get some lunch."

James and Remus followed him out while Sirius started to pull his hair.

--

"Maybe we should tell a professor," suggested Peter.

"NO!" shouted James and Sirius, although Sirius actually said, "ON!"

Remus gave them a look. "Why not?"

Sirius said, "Esuaceb ll'ew teg ni elbuort." James and Peter looked at him confused, but Remus just rolled his eyes.

"So you're worried about getting in trouble?" James and Peter turned their heads to stare at him with shocked faces.

"Eh dootsrednu em!!" Sirius said bouncing in his seat. "Eh did! Yyay!" He clapped his hands vigorously.

James ignored the spastic, dancing Sirius and asked Remus, "How did you do that?"

Remus was now pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't know! I just knew what he said."

Peter started to pile food onto his plate when Snape was passed.

"Hey. Snivelus," called out James. Snape turned around with a smug look on his face.

"Let me guess," he said, "you finally figured out what that spell does. Maybe we'll finally get some peace and quiet." James shot out of his seat and made his way over. He grabbed him by his collar, about to punch him, but Sirius caught his fist.

James looked at him with a confused look. "On. Tel em." He pulled out his wand and shouted a spell; a spell that backfired.

When the smoke cleared James, Sirius, Snape, and Remus (who tried to stop Sirius) had orange hair, purple skin, and enlarged parts of their faces. Peter started to laugh hysterically.

Snape looked Sirius on the eye and said, "Now look at what you've done you Neanderthal!"

Sirius and James lunged at him while Remus just looked at his purple skin.

"What in the name of Merlin is going on here?!"

Everyone looked at an enraged Professor McGonagall. The four purple boys all started to talk at once. "Enough! 10 points from each of you unless one of you can come up with a good explanation."

Remus started to explain but McGonagall stopped him. "Not you Mr. Lupin. Or you Mr. Snape," who was about to say something. "I want one of you two," pointing to James and Sirius, "to explain."

"Well, you see, Minnie," said James. "Snivelus insulted us. We thought that wouldn't do," he leaned in, "we _do_ have house pride," and leaned back.

"That doesn't explain the bad spell," countered the professor.

James said, "Sirius said it wrong."

She raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

"I t'nac klat thgir," explained Sirius. McGonagall looked at him with the same look his friends gave him earlier.

"What?"

"He said: I can't talk right," explained Remus. The entire Great Hall was now paying attention to them and everyone's attention had now shifted to him. "What? So I can understand him. So what?"

McGonagall shook her head, "How did this happen?"

James and Sirius pointed to Snape. "He did it! He did it!" Or in Sirius's case, "Eh did ti! Eh did ti!"

Like Remus had done earlier, she pinched the bridge of her nose. "Please reverse the spell, Mr. Snape. And then we can all put this behind us."

"Fine," said a dejected Snape. "Sermo Porro."

Everyone looked at Sirius. "Well?" someone said.

"Say something," said James.

"Gnihtemos," said Sirius. "Tihs!"

"Well now," said Dumbledore. "Isn't that a predicament?" Everyone looked at him.

"What are you talking about, Albus?" asked McGonagall.

"Looks like Mr. Black will be talking like that for a little bit longer," he smiled and made his way back to the head table.

--

-I'm not sure if that's what it really is. I used a translator. So if there are any Latin freaks out there yelling "You said it wrong!!' don't get mad at me. And take a chill pill, or eat some chocolate.

A/N 2: This is was actually kind of hard to write. I'll tell you a secret: If I get enough review, I continue this. So, press the little button to tell me what you think. –smiles- :3


	2. Snivelus?

A/N: I really hope that no one has gotten a headache reading the first chapter. I'm sorry if you did. And I'm not sure if you know this, but this is (or will be) SLASH!

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"He can't be serious," said a stunned James as everyone turned back to their lunches.

"Fo esruoc ton," said Sirius. "I ma." Remus turned to the boy and hit his head.

"TAHW?!" exclaimed the battered boy.

"Now is not a time for jokes," answered Remus. James and Peter were laughing in the background; Sirius turned to them and stuck out his tongue. Remus sat down at the table and returned to his own lunch.

"What are you going to do about classes, Siri?" asked Peter.

Before Sirius could open his mouth, Remus answered for him. "He's going to stay silent."

Sirius was going to open his mouth to argue, but James beat him to the punch. "What happens if a teacher wants an answer from him?"

Sirius tried to answer, but was interrupted, again. "Remus will have to talk for him," suggested Peter.

"What? Why me?" cried Remus.

"Because," reasoned Peter, "You're the only one who can understand him."

James looked at Remus, "Why is that?"

"I…I…I don't know," stammered Remus.

James continued to stare at him with a smug look, "Maybe it's cuz you lo-,"

"You're still purple!" Remus interrupted quickly.

The other two boys looked at James and burst out laughing. They didn't notice it before because they were too caught up in the conversation.

"Yeah, well purple is the color of royalty," stated James. "That means I am now, drum roll please, King James!" He was now standing with his hands on his hips looking up to the ceiling.

"Erom ekil Ecnirp Semaj," Sirius stood on his seat and put an empty bowl on his head. "I ma eht gnik!"

They all laughed at his theatrics, and Remus told James what Sirius had said.

"You're not the king, I AM!"

"Well you both look ridiculous," Remus said through giggles. "You're hair is still orange and your ear is much bigger than it should be."

"Well you're not much better," retorted James sitting back in his seat. Sirius and Peter both busted out laughing.

"Maybe you guys should change back," offered Peter.

Remus and James both tried to reverse the spell but it didn't work.

"That can't be good," said Peter trying to cover up his laughing.

Remus rolled his eyes and looked at Sirius. "Maybe you can give it a try?"

"Erus," he said. He said the spell to reverse it, and it worked. To an extent, the boys' skin was still tinted a pale purple but their hair and faces were back to normal.

When lunch was done they made their way to their next class. Potions with the Slytherins.

--

When they entered the dungeon they saw Snape, who looked back to normal.

"Woh did eh od taht?" cried Sirius.

"I don't know," answered Remus. He walked over to Snape and asked.

"It wasn't that hard," he answered smugly. "I just resized my chin and dyed my hair back to normal."

"But how did you change back your skin?"

Snape looked at his tinted face and smiled an evil smile, "I'll tell you later." He went and sat in his seat. Remus raised an eyebrow and went to his.

He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to face Sirius. "Yeah?"

"Tahw erew uoy gniklat tuoba?" he asked.

"Don't worry about it, Siri"

"Now class," said Professor Slughorn, "You will be working in groups of two today, and I will be picking your partners. It's an easy potion, so it shouldn't take you more than an hour. Now, when I call your name get with your partner. Snape and Crabbe. Malfoy and Goyle. Potter and Lupin. Pettigrew and Black. Sand-."

"Professor," interrupted Remus.

Slughorn looked up from the list he was reading and looked at Remus. "Yes, Mr. Lupin?"

"Since Sirius can't talk correctly, maybe I should be his partner."

Slughorn looked at Sirius, "Can you understand me?" Sirius nodded. "Can you read?" Sirius nodded again. Slughorn returned to addressing Remus. "I don't see a reason why Mr. Black and Mr. Pettigrew cannot be partners."

"But-,"

"No," said Slughorn. "Now go sit with Mr. Potter. Where was I? Oh, yes. Sanders and Billows…"

Remus and Sirius switched spots and James leaned over to whisper, "Do you think it's going to be that bad?"

"Hopefully, the potion will be as easy as Prof. Slughorn says," Remus showed James his crossed fingers.

--

-BOOM-

"Timmad! I dias esiwkcolc! ESIWKCOLC!"

Remus and James looked up from the almost finished potion to see Sirius and Peter covered in hot pink goo. Prof. Slughorn told them to clean up their mess and to write an essay due tomorrow.

"Taerg," scowled Sirius.

Peter started to clean up and mumbled an apology.

"Be nice," whispered Remus from behind him. Sirius turned toward him and mouthed something, and Remus just scowled back.

James had been watching the entire thing, "What'd he say?"

"…Nothing," replied Remus.

"So," he started conversationally, "How long have you liked Sirius?"

Remus' head shot up and he looked at his friend with wide eyes. "Wh-what are you talking a-about?"

"Oh come on. A Hufflepuff could tell you got the hots 'Hogwart's Heartthrob'."

"No they couldn't. I mean- No I don't."

"Ha! I knew it!" shouted James in triumph. "So…How long?"

"Just…since the beginning of this year," he looked down at the table with a slight blush.

They finished their potion and bottled it up. "Are you going to tell him?"

Remus shook his head, "Nope, never."

Sirius and Peter came over to them as they were packing up their things. "Tahw erew uoy syug gniklat tuoba?"

"Oh, just about Remus' love life," James said with a smile. "He's got a crush on someone." Remus quickly turned to him and glared.

"If you tell them who it is, I can promise you that you will never ever have children. Got it?"

James nodded his head with wide eyes. "Good," said a cheery Remus.

They left the dungeons and were on their way to Gryffindor Tower when Remus saw Snape.

"I'll catch you guys later, ok?" The others watched him jog off towards the Slytherin.

"S'erehw eh gniog?" asked Sirius. James just shrugged his shoulders and continued his way, with Peter tailing him the entire time. Sirius stayed behind to watch the slimey-git.

--

Sirius followed the pair to the library, hiding the entire way. They made their way to a secluded corner, talking in whispers the entire time. _'What are they talking about?'_ He saw Remus laugh at something he said. _'He made Remus laugh! He's not allowed to make him laugh.'_

He hurried over to the pair yelling, "SUMER!" and glomped him.

"Sirius? What are you doing here?" asked Remus, giving an apologetic look to Snape.

"I dessim uoy. Dna I deen pleh htiw ym krowemoh. Pleh em, esaelp?"

"What did he say?" asked Snape.

"He wants me to help him with his homework. We'll talk later, okay?"

Snape agreed and left the library. "So, what did you really want?" Remus gave him a look.

"I deen pleh htiw krowemoh, yllaer."

"Sure you do." Remus stood up and they headed out of the library.

"Os, ohw od uoy evah a hsurc no?"

Remus shot a quick look at him before answering. His friends already knew he was gay so he didn't have to worry about that. _'Maybe I should tell him.' _Before Remus could make up his mind, Sirius asked him a question.

"Dluoc uoy ta tsael evig em a elpuoc fo stnih?"

"Sure," He started to count his fingers. "He's in our year, he makes me laugh, I talk to him a lot, and…um…he's got black hair? How's that?"

"Doog," he said trying to hide his disappointment. '_He's in our year. He makes him laugh. They talk a lot. And he's got black hair. Who does that sound like?'_ He thought in silence when it hit him. _'He likes Snivelus!'_

--

According to urbandictiony(dot)com- to glomp: "it is the action of one person lovingly (and dramatically) attacking another with a hug."

A/N 2: I figured that in Sirius' head the words sound right. So I decided to write them the correct way. I'll post chapter 3 when I get at least 10 reviews for this chapter. I know, I'm e-vile. Bwahahaha -cough- -choke- I'm okay. :3


	3. Codes and Girls

A/N: I want to thank Taleitha for giving me the idea for a simple code for Sirius. And I used the "No I will not snog you" idea. Thanks!

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"Sirius?" asked a concerned Remus.

The boy looked at him, "Huh?"

"I asked if you were okay. You look kind of spaced out."

"Sey. M'i enif."

By now they had made their way to Gryffindor Tower and were greeted by the other two Marauders.

"What were you guys doing?" asked James giving Remus a little nudge.

Remus pushed his arm, "Nothing. I was talk-."

"Remus!"

The four boys turned around to see Lily Evans running over to them. She stopped in front of Remus with a smile.

"Hi, Lily," Remus smiled. "What did you need?"

"Yes, my Lily Flower," interrupted James, who moved in front of Remus. "Why do you need our little friend? I'm sure _I_ could be more helpful." He gave her his best 'Date-Me' smile.

Lily rolled her green eyes and pushed James away. "Well, _Remus_, there's a Prefect Meeting before dinner, right now. I wanted to know if you wanted to walk with me."

"I would love to, Lil," he stuck out his arm and she took it. They made their way to the portrait and Remus called out, "Bye guys. See you at dinner." He and Lily continued their way to the meeting.

"Eh saw gniklat ot Sulevins!" cried Sirius when they were gone. "Sulevins!"

James and Peter just stared at him.

"SULEVINS!"

"What are you talking about?" asked Peter.

Sirius started to pull at his hair, again.

"Why don't you try doing little signs or something?" suggested James. "Oh! We can play charades!" He and Peter ran to the couch and sat down, waiting patiently.

Sirius rolled his eyes and made his way to them. _'How the hell am I supposed to tell them about Remus and Snivelus?'_

Sirius started to jump up and down, he was so excited. He held up four fingers.

"Oh, oh. Four words!" exclaimed Peter. Sirius shook his head rapidly.

He held one finger. He then placed his hands together, as if he was praying, and opened it up.

"Book!" yelled out James, and Sirius nodded. He then pointed to them. "Us!"

Sirius nodded again.

"Book and us," said Peter. "Oh, is the first word Remus?"

Sirius smiled and help up two fingers. "Second word."

He made a gesture with his hand, "Hand," yelled Peter.

James shoved him off the couch and looked back up at Sirius. "Ow"

James put the two words together, "Remus and talk. What's the third word?"

Sirius held up two fingers again. "No, Siri, they THIRD word," said James.

Sirius hit him in the head and held up the two fingers again. "The third word is 'to' James," said Peter. Sirius pointed to his nose. "So far, we've got Remus, talk, and to."

Sirius slicked back his hair and scowled. James jumped out of his seat and yelled, "Snivelus!"

Sirius was now jumping up and down again nodding his head.

"Remus talk to Snivelus?" Peter put together.

"Wait," interrupted James, "You mean to tell us that _our_ Remus was actually _talking _to Snivelus?"

"SEY!"

"About what?"

"I t'nod wonk," Sirius said glumly.

"Huh?" they asked together. Sirius glared at them and shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm sick of not understanding you," James said suddenly. "We need to make up a code." They spent the rest of the afternoon coming up with a simple code so they could understand him when Remus wasn't around.

--

"Why did we need that meeting?" asked Remus. They had just finished up and everyone was heading toward the Great Hall for dinner. "I mean, no one really has to worry about Sirius."

"Well," Lily answered, "You saw what happened at lunch today. You've still got some of the residue on you." She pointed to his purple-tinted hand. "The seventh years just want everyone to keep an eye on Black, to make sure something like that doesn't happen again."

"I guess you're right," Remus sighed. "I'm not going to tell him though. I don't want him to A) get worried, or B) make things worse for everyone."

Lily suppressed a smile and gave his arm a squeeze, "I'll see you later, okay?"

"Yeas, sure." She made her way over to her friends while he did the same.

"Sumer, sseug tahw ew did yadot," said an ecstatic Sirius. Remus sat down and looked at his friends.

"What did you guys do?" he started to put food on his plate.

"Uoy evah ot kool!"

"Yeah," said an equally ecstatic James.

Remus rolled his eyes and smiled before looking across the table to his friends.

Sirius pretended to push up a pair of glasses, "That's me," said James.

Sirius then puffed out his cheeks, "I still don't understand why that one has to be me," whined Peter.

Sirius then pretended to read a book. "Guess who that one is. Moony," asked James.

"Hmm…Let me guess. Me maybe?" he smiled. Sirius nodded his head enthusiastically. "That's very clever guys. Got anything else up your sleeves?"

"Yup," answered James and Peter while Sirius nodded. Sirius waved to Remus.

"Hello to you to, Siri." Sirius blushed at the nickname, but continued the show.

He puckered up his lips and then covered them, "That means 'No I will not snog you'," explained James.

"When will he ever use that?" asked a giggling Remus. And then Sirius did his impression of Snape. "I see. So when Severus finally reveals his true feelings, you can still reject him." Everyone was laughing except for Sirius, who turned to glare at said Slytherin.

"Is that another one?" asked Remus.

Peter and James looked at Sirius, who was still glaring at Snape. "No. Unless you guys came up with that one when I wasn't looking," answered Peter.

"Nope," said James. He was about to get Sirius' attention when a girl came up to him.

"Hi, Sirius," she said. She sat in the empty seat next to him. "How's it going?"

"Enif," he replied.

"Huh?"

"He said: 'Fine'," replied Remus.

"Oh. Okay." She smiled at him. "I was wondering if you had any plans for tomorrow."

Sirius placed a finger to his chin and thought. "Ton taht M'i erawa fo."

She looked at Remus who translated, "'Not that I'm aware of'."

"Good. Then could you help me with something at Hogsmeade? I'll buy you lunch."

A smile grew on his face, "Erus."

The girl looked at Remus again. He said, "'Sure'."

"Yayy," she leaned over a placed a kiss on his cheek. She hurried back from where she came.

Peter watched her go, "Who's she?"

"Her name is Angela Combs," supplied James. "I think she's a year under us. She's in Revenclaw."

"No wonder I don't know who she is," said Peter. "I only find out about girls like that when Sirius dates them."

Sirius' ears perked up when he heard that. "M'i gniog no a etad?"

"That's what happens when two people have a meal together," reasoned James.

"Ho," said Sirius. He shrugged his shoulders and continued to eat his dinner. The rest soon followed his lead

--

"I don't see why you don't tell him," said James. Sirius and Peter went to Hogsmeade to get some firewhiskey while James and Remus went back to their dorm room.

"In case you failed to see at dinner," reasoned Remus, "Sirius has a date. With a girl. He doesn't even like guys."

"You don't know that," countered James. "Just because you've never seen him with a guy, doesn't mean that it can't happen."

"I don't want to talk about this with you."

"Why not?"

"Because, frankly, it's none of your business," Remus got up and started to collect his things when James placed a gentle hand on his arm.

"I'm sorry. Okay? Don't leave. I'm just trying to be helpful."

Remus sat back down on his bed, where James and he had landed. "I just don't want to talk about this right now."

"Does that mean that we can talk about it later," James asked hopefully.

Remus looked at James and slowly nodded his head. James was about to ask when, when Sirius burst into the room yelling, "Reven niaga. I esufer ot og htiw enoyna ohw t'nseod dnatsrednu em!"

Remus and James just stared at them. Peter told them that they had made it safely to and from Hogsmeade. But when they got into the common room they were stopped by Lily 'Perfect Prefect' Evans had caught them sneaking in with contraband. "She took it from us, and threatened to tell McGonagall."

"I dlot mih ot eb teiuq. Tub on! Eh dah ot yas gnihtemos," Sirius huffed and made his way to Remus' bed. James had gotten up and was opening his trunk.

Sirius had lain down on the bed and had rest his head on Remus' lap. Remus started to play with his hair unconsciously and Sirius started to lean into the touch and closed his eyes.

When James turned around as saw the spectacle, he raised an eyebrow and looked at Remus with a smile. "What?" mouthed Remus.

James just shook his head and mouthed back, "Nothing."

Peter had watched this all happen and when Sirius realized that it was silent, he opened an eye. "Yhw si ti os teiuq?"

"No reason, Siri," Remus got off his bed and headed down to the common room with the book he was reading earlier.

The other Marauders continued making up codes for simple things.

--

"Hey," said James a few hours later. "Don't you guys have an essay to write for Sluggy?"

"I finished mine," Peter said smugly.

"This, I togrof!" cried Sirius. He collected his things and made his way to the common room.

When he got down there he stopped in his tracks. Sitting there looking like a beautiful angel was none other than Remus. The dying fire was hitting him just right, enhancing his gorgeous features. _'Beautiful? Gorgeous? Angel? What am I doing? I don't think like that. At least not about Remus.'_

While he was thinking, Remus had looked up at Sirius.

"Are you just going to stand there? Or are you going to come sit down?"

Sirius stuck out his tongue and said, "M'i tsuj gniog ot dnats ereh."

Remus smiled to himself and returned to his book. A few minutes later, Sirius joined him on the couch. "So. I see you finally remembered about your essay for tomorrow."

"Puy."

"Let me guess. You want my help."

Puy, niaga."

"Okay," he placed his book on the table and faced Sirius.

--

A/N 2: I'm going to stop there. It's not a cliffy like the other two chapters but I couldn't keep writing. I don't want this chapter to be too long. It's over 1,700 words long. The other two chapters weren't that long. So press that button down there. You know, the one that says 'Go'.It takes you to a review page. And if I get enough (10) reviews I _might_ put up another chapter. :3


	4. The Cute Couple

A/N: Thanks to everyone who has commented/added the story. That means a lot to me. And to all you other people don't be afraid to tell me what you think. I can take it, I'm a big girl.

A/N 2: There is a poll on my profile. Please go take it, it will help out the story.

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"Now," started Remus. "You and I both know you're much better at potions. Agreed?"

Sirius nodded his head, "Sey." He put his book and parchment next to Remus' book.

"So, my 'help' would be what, exactly?"

"Llew. I saw gnipoh taht uoy dluow etirw ti rof em."

"I'm not going to write it for you. That's cheating, and I'm not in the mood."

"Esaelp, Ynoom. Rof Em?"

"No. And stop giving me those puppy-dog eyes." Sirius stuck his tongue out at his friend. He was about to get up but Remus grabbed his arm. "I never said I wouldn't help you write it, though."

Sirius engulfed him and a hug, "Sknaht Mer. Os," he grabbed the book and opened it up to a random page, "Erehw od ew tarts?"

Remus grabbed the book and turned it to the right page and gave it back to him. "Why don't you write down what you know about the potion and then let me read it. I'll fix as much as I can." When he saw the glint in the other's eyes he continued his explanation. "In the grammatical sense."

Sirius squinted his eyes and said, "I wonk taht." He pulled out a quill and started to write his paper. Remus grabbed his book and sat on the couch so he could face Sirius. A few minutes later Remus looked at the essay in progress.

"Siri?" The boy looked up.

"Tahw?"

"Please read what you just wrote." Sirius looked down at his paper and his eyes grew.

"Yhw si ym yasse sdrawkcab? Tahw pneppah?" Remus closed his book and grabbed the essay from Sirius and read it.

"It looks like whatever you say or write comes out backwards. But whatever you hear or see goes in forwards. Right?"

Sirius turned to him and gave him a confused look and scratched his head."Tahw?"

"Everything going into your brain," Remus started to tap his forehead, "is right, got that?"

Sirius pushed the offending finger away and nodded. "And everything leaving it is coming out backwards." Remus looked down to the essay again. "Oddly enough, I can read this."

"A tol fo doog taht lliw od em. Ygguls t'now eb elba ot." Sirius took the essay and tossed it onto the table and folded his arms across his chest.

'_He looks so cute when he does that,_' thought Remus. "How about this: You tell me about the potion and I'll write it all down. Are you fine with th-?" Sirius cut him off with another big hug.

"Knaht uoy! Knaht uoy!"

"Can't. Breathe. Crushing. Lungs." Sirius loosened his grip but held onto him.

'_He's so warm. And soft. Not like girls' soft, bu-._' When he realized what he was about to think, Sirius quickly let go of him and sat back. "Yrros."

"No problem. So, ready?"

"Sey!" They spent the next couple of hours writing Sirius' essay.

--

"Finally. We're done! Can we go to bed now?" asked the tired werewolf.

Stifling a yawn, Sirius nodded his head. "Em Ypeels. Yrrac em, Sumer."

"Tch, yeah right." Sirius looked at him.

"Yhw ton?"

"Because, Mr. Padfoot. You are slightly heavier than I am."

"Ma ton!"

"Are too!"

"Ma TON!"

"Are TOO!"

"Ma. TON!" Sirius shoved Remus, who fell on the floor.

"I'm too tired to get up," said the sleepy boy. "I'm just going to sleep here tonight."

"No eht roolf?" asked Sirius as he peered at Remus.

"Yes."

"Ho rof eht evol fo Nilrem." Sirius got up from the couch, picked Remus up, and flung him over his shoulder.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Gnikat uoy ot deb." Remus complained the entire way there, but when they entered the door room he shut up. Sirius walked over to Remus' bed and dropped him there. Remus started to unbutton his shirt when Sirius dropped onto his bed.

"What are you doing?" he whispered.

"Oot derit ot evom. Annog peels ereh."

"You can't be serious." He saw Sirius open his mouth, "And if you say that stupid pun, I swear, you'll never be able to talk right again."

Sirius snapped his mouth closed and sat up; he started to remove his shoes. Remus rolled his eyes and went to his trunk; he pulled out a pair of pajamas. He went to the bathroom so he could have some light to change.

When he re-entered the room he saw Sirius' clothes strewn all over the place. He then looked toward his bed and saw the bump. As he got closer he saw the black hair across his pillow. He sighed and made his way to the net bed, which was Sirius'.

"Ynoom." He turned around.

"Yes, Sirius?" Remus whispered.

"Erehw era uoy gniog?"

"To your bed. I'm tired and I want to sleep." He saw Sirius open the covers.

"Neht peels ereh." Without thinking, Remus walked over to his own bed and crawled in. When he finally got settled, Sirius laid his head on Remus' shoulder and fell asleep.

Remus moved his arm so it wasn't being crushed by the other boy. When his arm was free he pulled Sirius closer to him. "Night Siri."

--

When Peter awoke he looked over to Sirius' bed, thinking that the boy had pulled an all-nighter and had fallen asleep in the common room. When he saw the empty bed he went over to James' bed. He shook the boy awake.

"Wha-? Pete? What's wrong?" he asked groggily.

Peter held his finger to his lips, "Shh. Remus is still asleep. Sirius fell asleep downstairs again. Want to go wake him?" James had put his glasses on by now, and gave him a devious smile.

"Look who's showing his Marauder colors so early in the morning. Okay, let's go."

They both snuck down to the common room, trying to not wake the sleeping boy. When they got down there they couldn't find Sirius anywhere. Finally giving up, they made their way back to their room.

"Where do you think he is?" asked Peter.

"I don't kno-," he was cut off when he saw all the clothes surrounding Remus' bed. Now it was his turn to shush the other boy. He pointed to the bed and whispered "Follow me." As they got closer they saw not one, but two sleeping boys.

In the middle of the night Sirius had somehow moved to practically lying on top of the smaller boy. The blanket had moved, revealing their legs, which were now tangled. Remus was now hugging the boy on top of him and they both looked happy.

"Want to ruin it?" asked James. Peter nodded his head with a devilish grin.

--

Remus was having a very pleasant dream of him and a certain boy when he was rudely woken up by freezing water being dumped on him. He shot up in bed and saw James and Peter bent over laughing their heads off. He looked for the other boy and saw that he had been catapulted onto the floor.

He quickly got up and helped Sirius off the floor. He then turned to his friends and glared at them.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" he yelled. Sirius looked at the bed and then at Remus. He saw that both were soaked but he wasn't.

"Woh did uoy od taht?" he asked James. James was about to answer but Remus cut him off.

"I've been soaked with freezing water, and that's all you have to ask?"

Sirius wrapped his arms around the shivering boy and held him close, "Yrros. I naem, yhw did uoy od taht?" He turned his head to glare at James. But James had raised an eyebrow at Remus.

"Sorry, what?" he attention was now on Sirius.

"Reven dnim." Peter and James looked at Remus.

"He said: 'Never mind'. Now if you three don't mind, I'm going to take a warm shower. Hopefully I can bring my body temperature back up to normal." Sirius let go of Remus, a little reluctantly, and Remus went to the showers.

"Maybe we should dry his bed," suggested Peter. The other boys nodded and got to work. When they were finished, Sirius asked why James had done that.

"I couldn't help it. You two just looked so cute. I had to break it up."

Peter had made his way over to his trunk and had gotten out some clothes. "What are we going to do today?"

"Well, Sirius has a date. We can-." James was interrupted by Sirius.

"S'ti TON a etad!" Both boys looked at him.

"Huh?" they both asked.

Sirius threw his hands in the air and stormed over to his trunk. He grabbed some clothes and started to get changed. The other boys soon followed his lead.

Ten minutes later Remus walked out in only a towel; Peter had already left for breakfast so it was just James and Sirius in the room. Remus made his way to his trunk mumbling about forgetting his clothes.

James looked at Sirius who was lounging on Peter's bed, which just happened to be across from Remus' bed. Sirius stared at Remus' still wet chest until he stopped in front of his trunk. When he bent over, Sirius' attention was now drawn to another body part.

When James noticed Sirius staring he smiled to himself. '_I knew he liked Remus. _' He cleared his throat, but only loud enough for Sirius to hear. Sirius abruptly turned his head to James and blushed when he saw him looking at him.

"M'i gniog ot tsafkaerb." He shot up from the bed and hurried down the stairs.

Both boys stared at him, one bewildered and the other knowing. "I'm going to breakfast, which is where he's going I assume. Get dressed and meet us in the Great Hall, kay?"

Remus nodded his head and finished getting dressed.

--

The first thing James said to his friends when he got to the Hall was, "I saw you staring."

Peter and Sirius looked up at him. "What are you talking about James?"

"I wasn't talking about you Pete," James sat down across from the others, his back to the Slytherins. "Although, you were staring at Melissa Billows yesterday. But that's a topic for another time." He turned to Sirius, "I saw you staring this morning."

"I saw ton," defended Sirius as he shook his head.

"Yes you were."

"On I t'nsaw," still shaking his head.

"Yes. You were."

"On. I t'nsaw," shaking his head even harder.

"Yes. You. Were."

Sirius was about to protest again when Remus walked up. "What were you guys talking about?"

James looked at Sirius, who had grabbed his head, and gave him a knowing look. "Nothing. Don't worry about it Moony." Remus just shrugged his shoulders and sat next to James.

The boys had all started eating when Angela came over to the table and sat next to Sirius. "Ready for today?" asked the blonde girl.

"Huh?" asked Sirius.

"Yesterday you said you'd help me with something at Hogsmeade. You remember, don't you?"

"Of course he remembers," answered James. He kicked Sirius under the table.

"Wo. I naem, sey. Erehw od uoy tnaw ot teem?"

Angela gave him a confused look, "What?"

Remus continued to eat as he said, "He said: 'Where do you want to meet?"

"Oh, I still can't understand you. Well, I was thinking we could meet in front of Madame Puddifoots around 1 o'clock. And then we can go from there. Is that ok?" She looked at Sirius and then Remus. And Remus looked at Sirius.

"Erehwyna tub ereht." Remus smiled and nodded.

"He said 'Sure'." Angela got up and gave Sirius a kiss. When she was gone, Sirius leaned across the table and punched Remus in the arm.

"Ow. That's going to leave a bruise." He rubbed his arm where he had been hit.

"I epoh ti seod," said Sirius angrily as he sat back down. "I dias ON!"

"I'm going to guess that Sirius didn't want to meet there," Peter said trying to hide a laugh. He was doing a lot better than James, whose face had turned red. The idea of Sirius going to Madame Puddifoots' was too much too handle.

Remus just shrugged and continued eating. When James and Peter could finally breathe right, they ate their breakfast too. Sirius spent the rest of the meal mumbling to himself.

When Remus was finished eating he got up, his back was still to the Slytherins. After he was out of his chair he felt someone tap his shoulder. He turned around and there was Snape.

"Do you want to finish that conversation from yesterday, Remus?"

"I'd love to Severus," he said with a smile.

'_Love to? Love?_' thought Sirus.

Remus turned to his friends, "I'll see you guys at Hogsmeade." He waved goodbye and he and Snape made their way out.

The entire time Sirius was glaring at the duo. "Jealous, much?" asked James.

Sirius looked at him with a sad look on his face "On. Eh nac etad enoyna eh stnaw." After saying this he got up and left the Great Hall.

"What did he say?" asked Peter.

"I don't know," confessed James.

--

James and Peter went to find the solemn boy; they found him in front of the fire in the common room on the couch he and Remus had been not more than 12 hours ago.

"Who put a spider in your soup?" asked James as they got closer.

Sirius looked up at him, "Huh?"

"I think he meant who put the fly in your soup. Right?" said Peter.

"Yeah. Sure. Whatever." James sat next to Sirius and Peter sat by his feet. "So why _are _you sad?"

"Sumer sekil Sulevins," he answered.

"You do know that Remus isn't here, right?" asked James. "We don't know what you just said."

Sirius huffed and stood in front of the fire. He turned towards them and gave his impression of Remus, and then he made a kissy face. His last impression was of Snape.

"Remus. Kissy. Snivelus." James and Peter thought about it for a moment. And then they burst out laughing.

James wiped away a tear and looked at Sirius. "He doesn't like Snivelus."

"Neht ohw?" asked an irritated Sirius.

"He lik-" Peter was interrupted when James hit him in the head.

"Shut up." James then looked at Sirius. "We can't tell you. Remus asked us not too. Sorry."

Sirius pointed to Peter and gave him a questioning look. "You wanna know how I know?" Sirius nodded and waited for an answer. "I saw him staring…um…at the boy. I asked him about it and he told me."

"Wait a minute," cried James. "He just told you? I had to trick it out of him." James sat back and crossed his arms.

Sirius made his way over to the couch and sat down. "Yhw t'now eh llet em?"

"Huh?"

"Dnimreven."

James looked up at the clock, "Hey. You need to meet Angela in 15 minutes."

They all made their way to the portrait hole. Then Peter had a thought, "How is she supposed to understand him?"

"Don't worry," both boys looked at James. "I have a plan."

--

A/N 3: Wow this chapter is long. I wasn't expecting it to be this long. I'm pretty sure most of you can guess what the plan is. If you can't don't worry. The next chapter will be up when I get 10 reviews (just like last time). So press the pretty button down there -points to button- Bye!

P.S. In case you didn't read the second Author's note, **I have a poll on my profile**. Please go and take it. It will affect the story, but only a little.


	5. The Date

A/N: I'm starting classes tomorrow so I don't know how often I'll be updating. But I'll try my best to do it as often as I can. I'm typing up something on Quizilla, so I've got that and this. So sorry in advance if it takes a while for them to come out. On with the story.

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"I'm going to go find Lily," James said randomly. "I haven't asked her out in," he looks at his watchless wrist, "two hours. I'll meet you guys at Madame Puddifoot's." He ran back to the castle.

'_Now if I were Remus and Snivelus, where would I go?_' he thought to himself. '_Ah ha! The library._' He quickly made his way there.

When James entered the large silent room he swiftly made his way to where he thought Remus would be. '_There they are_' when he spotted them.

He walked up to the table where his friend and his arch-nemesis were sitting and sat down. Remus and Snape both looked up at him, surprised that he wasn't hanging out with the others.

"Hey, Prongs," greeted Remus. "Why aren't you at Hogsmeade?"

James turned his whole body to his friend and replied, "You remember how you're the only one who can understand Sirius?" Remus nodded with a raised eyebrow. "Well, I was thinking that maybe you could accompany them so Angela can understand him," he said with a smile.

"You want me to go with Sirius on his date?"

James shook his head, "If I remember correctly, it's not an official date. He's just helping her with…something."

Remus just gave him a skeptical look. "I don't think so, Prongs. I was going to spend the day with Severus." He gestured to the forgotten boy who gave James a wicked grin.

'_Maybe Sirius was right._' James returned his attention to Remus, "Why would you want to spend the day with this slimey git?"

"Because, James," said an irritated Remus, "He's my friend."

"He can't be your friend. He's a Slytherin!"

"Just because I'm a Slytherin doesn't mean that we can't be friends," interrupted Snape. James turned his head to the boy and gave him a death glare, but Snape didn't even flinch.

"I wasn't talking to you, you slimey git."

Snape stood up pulling out his wand and James did the same. Remus shot up and pulled Snape's arm down. "Guys, don't fight. Remember what happened last time that happened?" All three boys gave an involuntary shudder. "Let's discuss this like adults? Or at least sixth years?"

Snape sat down and James, not wanting to be out done, sat down too. Remus stayed standing until he was certain that they wouldn't attack each other. "Like I said, I was planning on spending the day with Severus. Sirius doesn't really need me."

James looked at Remus and gave him a look that clearly said 'Do-you-really-think-so?' "I can't even understand him. And he lives with me." He tries to scoot closer to Remus but can't because of the table. "Besides you get to spend the entire day with him."

"Yeah, I get to watch him and a girl snog the entire day. Just how I wanted to spend my Saturday."

"Oh come on Moony. He's your friend! He _needs_ you," James tried to put extra emphasis on the word 'needs' to try and get a different point across, but it seemed that it didn't work.

Remus thought about it for a moment and came up with an idea. "I'll do it if I can bring Severus with me." James stared at him with a stunned expression. Remus, ignoring him, turned to Snape. "Want to go with me?"

"Although I hate spending any extra time with Black, I do like to see him suffer."

"No. No no no no!" interrupted James. '_This is _not_ how it was supposed to go._'

Remus turned back to James, "Sorry. But I'm not in the mood to watch Sirius eat another girl's face off. I'll help if Severus can come."

'_Shit_' James gave his death glare to Remus, who also didn't flinch, and gave in. "Fine!"

--

Sirius and Peter were waiting for James when Angela showed up.

"Hi Sirius!" she exclaimed. She turned to Peter and held out her hand, "Hi, I'm Angela Combs."

Peter shook her hand, "I'm Pe-."

She interrupted him, "Oh, don't be silly. I know who you are. You're Peter Pettigrew. It's very nice to finally meet you." She turned to Sirius and grabbed his arm. "Ready to go?"

Sirius gave Peter a worried look and then looked at her, "Hu…ton tey."

She looked up at him, "What did you say?"

"I think he said 'No'," Peter tried to help. Sirius looked back up at Peter and pointed to his nose.

Angela looked at Peter, "What does that mean?"

"That's a charade gesture. It means I got it right."

She looked back at Sirius, "What are we waiting for?"

"Semaj. Eh dna Ylil era desoppus ot teem su ereh."

She let go of Sirius' arm and turned her whole body to look at him. "What did you say?"

"He said," everyone looked to see James, Remus, and Snape coming towards them, "'James. He and Lily are supposed to meet us here.'" Remus looked at James. "But apparently he didn't see her." Remus whispered to James, "What are you planning?"

James ignored him and walked over to Peter. "Well, I...uh…couldn't find her. So I went to look for Moony. And I found him. See?"

Peter gave James a questioning look, "Yeah, we see James. But why is Sniv-."

James interrupts by 'remembering' that he needs some new pranks. "Come on, Pete. You can help me pick some out." Without another word he pulled Peter towards Zonko's Joke Shop.

"What are we doing?" asked Peter.

"We're giving them space," James answered as he continued to pull the boy to the joke shop.

"But why? And why did you bring Moony and Snivelus? I thought it was a date."

James stopped suddenly and looked at Peter. "It wasn't supposed to end up like that. I went to find Remus so he could 'help' them on their date. Angela was supposed to get fed up and leave. And then Pads and Moony were supposed to be alone and having fun! But when I went to find Remus he wouldn't agree to help with the 'date' without Snivelus."

"So what does that mean?"

"That means," James said with a devious smile, "That we have to get Snivelly away from the other three."

--

"Well. That was very sudden," says Angela. "So I guess it's just going to be us, huh?" She gave Sirius was lovely smile.

Before Sirius could say anything about her not understanding him, Remus beat him to it. "How are you supposed to know what he's saying?"

She looked at the boy questioning her, "Oh. Why don't you join us? You can too, Severus."

Snape gave her a smile, "I would love too. How about you Remus?" He turned to the boy.

Remus looked at Sirius, who gave him a pleading look. "I'd be glad to help the cute couple," he said through clenched teeth. He turned away before Sirius gave him a questioning look. "Where did you need to go today, Angela?"

She gave him a smile, "I need to buy my brother a birthday gift. He was a seventh year when you guys were in fifth year. He thought you guys were hilarious. I wanted to get him the perfect gift this year." She turned to Sirius, "I was hoping that you could help me."

"Neht yhw did uoy tnaw ot teem ereh?" Angela looked at Remus.

"He said: 'Then why did you want to meet here?'"

"Because, I just finished lunch with my boyfriend. He went somewhere with his friends."

"Uoy evah a dneirfyob?"

"'You have a boyfriend?'"

"Of course I do. Did you think this was an actual date? Silly." She takes his hand and pulls him forward.

Snape and Remus exchange glances as they follow the pair.

--

"What are you planning on doing?" asked Peter.

"We're going to do the most obvious thing in the world, Worm."

"Oh," he paused. "And what would that be?"

James looked at Peter with a disbelieving look. "We're going to get Snivelly to chase us."

"Oh. Does he have to chase both of us?"

"Yes. Yes he does."

--

The other four found their way to a muggle joke shop. "Siht skool ekil a doog ecalp ot trats," says Sirius. When no translation came, both Sirius and Angela looked back to Remus. He and Snape were engrossed in a conversation and hadn't heard what was said.

Sirius clears his throat to get Remus' attention. But instead he got Snape's. Snape looked at Sirius and then pointed to him. Remus looked up, "What did you say Siri?"

Sirius repeated his self, "He said: 'This looks like a good place to start'," Remus translated. He smiled and turned back to Snape.

'_Grr…,_' thought Sirius, '_Why did he have to show up? Why am I doing this? Why won't he pay attention to me?_'

They entered the joke shop and split into two groups. Snape and Remus in one and Angela and Sirius in another.

After a half hour of looking Angela finally found the perfect gift for her brother. "And I promised you lunch. Where did you want to go?"

"Eht Eerht Skcitsmoorb," Sirius answered. "Yeht evah doog doof."

Remus translated, "He wants to go to The Three Broomsticks. He says they have good food." Sirius pointed to Remus and, reluctantly, to Snape.

Angela gave them both a smile and said she buy their lunch too. The four students were on their way there when James and Peter ambushed them.

The two boys stood in front of Snape and threw different hexes at him. When they were done his pants were down past his knees, his hair was a bright yellow color and spiked, and he had 'Gryffindor's #1"written on his forehead. There was more but Remus couldn't see it all. As soon as they were done shouting, James and Peter ran away. Snape pulled up his pants and chased them.

The three remaining teenagers watched them run away. "Aren't you guys going to do anything to stop them?" asked Angela. Sirius just shook his head and Remus said no. They continued their way to The Three Broomsticks.

When they got there Angela looked at the clock. "Oh! It's almost 2. I need to meet one of my friends back at school."

Sirius looked at her, "Tahw tuoba hcnul?"

Before Remus could open his mouth Angela handed Sirius more than enough money to pay for lunch. She got on her tip toes and kissed him on the cheek. She then turned to Remus and did the same. "Bye guys! Have fun." She waved bye to them and left.

Remus looked at Sirius who just shrugged. They got a table towards the back and sat down.

As soon as they sat down, their waiter showed up. "Hi. My name is Josh. What can I get you guys to start off with?"

Remus gave Sirius a quick look and ordered two butterbeers. "Those will be right up." He gave Remus a quick smile, who blushed in return.

"Yhw did uoy gnirb Sulevins?" Sirius asked abruptly.

Remus gave a shrug, "Like I told James earlier. I didn't want to watch you and some girl snog the afternoon away. So I invited Severus along."

"I t'ndluow od taht," he retorted. "Sulp, ti t'nsaw neve a etad."

"How was I supposed to know it wasn't a date? That's what is sounded like."

By now Josh had come up with their butterbeers, "What can I get the cute couple to eat?"

'_Could he be any more obvious?_' thought Sirius.

"We're not together," said Remus.

At this, Josh raised his eyebrows, "I'm sorry. I just thought that you to were on a date. I thought I heard one of say the word."

"We thought he," Remus pointed to Sirius, "was on a date but the girl just needed help buying a gift."

Josh turned to Sirius, "That was thoughtful of you." He turned back to Remus, "Why did you have to go with him?"

"Sirius has some…throat issues. We figured it would be a lot easier if I want with them instead of him straining his voice." Remus felt Sirius kick him under the table, and he shot him a glare.

"You're a nice guy, huh?" He turned back to Josh.

"That's what my friend's tell me. But I don't see it."

"Oh, come on! You spent your Saturday following your friend and a girl around. And I bet you didn't ask for anything in return."

When Josh said this Sirius gave a rude chuckle. Josh and Remus turned to look at him.

Josh looked back at Remus, who was still glaring at Sirius. "_Did_ you ask for something?"

When Remus turned back to Josh he had a sheepish smile on. "I didn't ask for anything. But I said I wanted to bring someone along."

When Josh heard this he backed up a little, Remus finally noticed that they had been moving closer to one another. "You brought your boyfriend," it was a statement, not a question.

"No!" Remus said a little too loudly. He turned to Sirius, "Severus is just a friend." Sirius looked down at the table with a blush. "I'm actually single."

Josh lit up when he heard this. "That's great!" When Remus looked up at him he continued, "I wanted to ask you out."

"You don't even know my name," said Remus with a little smile.

"Then why don't you tell me your name," Josh asked him, matching his smile.

"I could tell you my name is Remus Lupin. But then that wouldn't be fair."

"How is that not fair?" Josh asked him.

"Because. I don't know you're last name."

"I see the predicament. How about I tell you my name then." Josh stuck out his hand, "My name is Josh DeLance. What's your name?"

Remus shook his hand, "My name is Remus Lupin."

"Well, Remus Lupin. Would you like to go on a date with me?"

Remus smiled at this and was about to answer when he felt another kick from under the table.

He shot a look at Sirius, "Stop that!" he hissed. Sirius pointed to his stomach. "Fine." Remus looked at Josh and gave him an apologetic look.

Josh just smiled and let go of his hand and grabbed the pencil and pad he had placed on the table, "What can I get you guys?"

Remus turned to Sirius who pointed to something on the menu. "We'll get two of these," he said as he pointed to a chicken dinner. "Great that'll be right back." Josh left them to go place the order.

"I t'nod ekil taht yug," Sirius huffed out.

Remus, who was watching Josh, turned to Sirius. "Why not? He was very nice."

"Eh demussa uoy erew yag. Taht saw edur."

"Well, I don't think that. And when he gets back I'm going to say yes to the date."

Sirius looked at Remus with stunned look. "Tub…tub…uoy t'nod wonk mih! S'eh a regnarts!"

"So you want me to get to know him better?"

"Sey."

"Like I can do on a date?"

"On."

Remus rolled his eyes, "What's the real reason why you don't want me to date him?"

Sirius mumbled under his breath. Remus leaned in closer, "Sorry. Didn't catch that."

Sirius looked Remus in the eye and blurted out, "I kniht I ekil uoy."

--

A/N 2: Wow. That's a little longer than the last one. Cool! Like I said before, I'm not sure when I can update next. But I'll try my hardest to update as soon as possible (after I get 10 reviews).

A/N 3: **The poll is still up there. I'll keep it up for a while. So GO! VOTE!**


	6. Where's Remus?

A/N: Some of you might just hate me after this chapter.

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"What?" asked Remus.

Sirius looked down at the table, "I dias I kniht I ekil uoy."

This time what Sirius said sunk in, "You _think_ you like me?"

Sirius didn't look up he just nodded his head. "How can you_ think_ you like me? Either you do or you don't."

Sirius looked up at Remus, "M'i ton erus fi I ekil ouy. Siht si lla wen ot em."

'_Severus was right,_' thought Remus. '_I have to think of a reason to make him stop._'

"You just don't want me to go out with Josh." Remus stood up. "I can't believe you."

Sirius looked at him with wide eyes. "Tahw? ON! S'taht ton ti!" But Remus wasn't listening because he knew it wasn't true.

Without looking back Remus rushed out of The Three Broomsticks. He ran all the way back to Hogwarts. He headed to the Gryffindor tower and went to James' trunk.

--

When Remus and Josh were talking Sirius just kept getting madder and madder; he didn't like Josh talking to his Remus.

'_Wait, when did he become mine?_'

And then Remus said those things about Josh. When he said that Sirius' heart hurt, and he didn't know why.

Sirius chased after Remus but the werewolf was too fast for the animagus. '_Crap_' Sirius made his way to Gryffindor Tower. When he saw that Remus wasn't in the common room, he tried the dorms. '_Not here either._'

He thought about where Remus could have gone too when he thought of it.

'_The Marauder's Map!_' He rushed over to James' trunk and opened the lid. He searched there for a few minutes. When he realized that it wasn't there he tried the bed. When he couldn't find it there, he went to Peter's trunk and did the same.

When the two remaining Marauder's showed up, the room was a mess. "What the HELL, mate," yelled James when he saw the mess. Sirius's head shot up from where it had been looking, under his bed. Sirius ran over to James and Peter.

"Erehw si eh? EREHW?" he started to shake Peter, hoping that would help him remember.

"W-what?" was the only reply.

"SUMER! Erehw si Sumer?" He looked fearfully at James.

"What's wrong?" asked the worried boy. "You need to calm down. And where's Moony?"

"I T'NOD WONK!" yelled Sirius. "Ew erew ta Eht Eerht Skcitsmoorb. I dlot mih I kniht I ekli mih. Eh thguoht I t'ndid tnaw mih gnitad emos rehto yug. Tub s'taht ton ti. Eh nar tuo dna won M'i gniyrt ot dnif mih. I emac ereh dna eh t'nsaw ereh. I t'nac dnif eht S'reduaram pam."

Peter and James just looked at him blankly. "Why don't you try to write it down?" suggested James.

Sirius ran over to his bed and pulled out a piece of parchment, the essay from last night. "Oh. I see."

"What? What is it?" asked Peter. James showed it to Peter. "Man that sucks."

"Try to do charades. Try the hand gestures we made."

After an hour of guessing they finally got the whole story.

"I've seen this Josh guy. He's pretty good looking" James and Sirius turned to Peter. "What?!"

Ignoring him, James turned to Sirius. "We should split up. One of us should go to the library; he usually goes there. One of us should look for Lily; she might know where he is. And one of us should go to the lake. He likes to think there."

"I'll go to the library," offered Peter.

"I'll go to Lily, then," said James. "She can stand me slightly more that you, Pads." He said when he saw the look on his friend's face. "You go to the lake."

The three got up and headed to their separate ways.

--

After he got the Marauder's map, the invisibility cloak, and his bag Remus headed to the library. '_I'm going to solve Sirius' problem once and for all._' He placed the two objects in his bag as he entered the library.

Madam Pince greeted him as he passed her. But he headed to the back of the library and found a table far away from anybody. He placed his book bag on the table and pulled out the map. He opened it up and said the incantation to make it work. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

When the map was revealed, Remus looked for his friends. James and Peter were with Sirius in the dorm room. '_He has to explain what happened to them. I might have a half hour till they figure it out. I need to find those books._'

He went to the stacks of books with the map and the cloak in his hands.

--

An hour later Remus almost had all the books he thought he needed. He put the books he had on the table near his bag. He looked at the map, like he had a thousand times in the last hour, and saw Peter heading towards his table. Remus quickly placed the cloak over him.

Peter walked right past Remus, who had moved next to a book case. Peter made his way to the table with the books and Remus' bag. Peter looked at the bag and recognized it as his friend's. He sat down in the chair, waiting.

Peter waited an hour for his friend. He grabbed Remus' bag and left the library.

Remus took off the cloak when he saw Peter's footprints leave the library. "I can't believe he took my bag."

--

While Peter was waiting for waiting for Remus in the library, James went to look for Lily.

James was walking down the hallway near the Great Hall when he saw her. "Lily!" he called out.

She froze where she was and slowly turned around. "What do you want, Potter?"

"Have you seen Remus?" She looked at him stunned, expecting him to ask her out.

"Uh…no. Not since this morning."

"Ok. Thanks." He started to turn around but Lily grabbed his arm.

"What's wrong? Is Remus ok?" She had a worried look on her face.

James couldn't not answer her. "He's fine physically. But mentally, I'm not sure."

"What do you mean you're not sure? What happened?"

"He and Sirius go into a fight, I guess. Remus ran off and now we're looking for him."

"They hardly ever fight. What happened?"

"I'm not sure how much I can tell you. It's Sirius' private life. I've got to go. I'll see you later. Bye." James yanked his arm out of her grasp and went the way he came.

--

Sirius ran as fast as he could outside. He ran to the lake and looked around. He didn't find Remus there. But he did see Snape. '_Should I go over there and talk to him?_' He thought about it some more and figured out that it might not hurt.

Snape still had the writing on his forehead and his hair was still yellow, but, other than that, he looked like he usually did.

When Snape saw Sirius running over to him he started to leave. "On! Tiaw!"

Snape looked at Sirius; he had his hands up in surrender.

"You're not going to hex me, are you?" Sirius shook his head.

Snape crossed his arms across his chest, "What do you want?"

"Evah uoy nees Sumer?" When Snape gave him a questioning look Sirius came up with an idea.

"H-A-V-E Y-O-U S-E-E-N R-E-M-U-S?"

Snape looked at him stunned and then he had an evil smile. "Not since Hodgsmeade. Why? Did you two get into a fight?"

Sirius blushed but nodded. "Like I said. Not since Hogsmeads." He turned and walked away.

'_Great. Where else can he be_?' And then it hit him. '_The Room of Requirement!_'

Sirius ran all the way to the seventh floor. When he got there he only thought of one thing: Finding Remus.

When the doors appeared Sirius yanked them open. Inside it was empty. There was nothing. Sirius had never seen it like that before. He walked in not believing his eyes. When he reached the center of the room he turned around.

Then he saw him, Remus. Sirius rushed over and went to hug him, but stopped in his tracks. Remus didn't look right. And then Sirius realized what was wrong, Remus was smiling. '_Not like earlier._'

Imaginary Remus walked over to Sirius, and held out his hand. Sirius was about to grab onto it when another hand got to it first. He turned around and saw himself.

Imaginary Sirius and Remus looked at each other with loving eyes. Imaginary Sirius leaned into Imaginary Remus' ear and said something that made him laugh.

'_I bet Josh could never make him laugh like I do._'

That's when Sirius realized something; he wanted to be the only one to make Remus laugh like that. He loved it when Remus looked like that. He wanted Remus to always be happy. '_That just means that I have to be around him all the time._'

He smiled at his own logic. And then he remembered what Remus looked like when Josh was talking to him.

'_He looked happy then, too. But when I told him how I felt he looked terrified._' Sirius realized that he never wanted Remus to look like that again. '_Maybe he _should_ date Josh._'

But when he thought about Remus in someone else's arms, his stomach hurt. He sat down holding it, '_What's wrong with me? If I want him to be happy he should be with Josh._'

He sat there for a few moments. Every time he thought of Remus and Josh together his stomach hurt more. But when he thought of him and Remus, his stomach started to feel better. He got up and headed back to the common room, thinking of Remus the entire time.

--

When Remus found the last book he needed he made his way out of the library. '_Where should I go? I can't face Sirius yet._' He set the books down and looked at the map. '_Why can't I find him?_'

And then he found the boy. He popped out of nowhere on the seventh floor. '_The Room of Requirement._'

Then Remus saw another name on the map. '_They'll never think to look for me there._'

--

James was sitting on his bed in the dorm room when Peter and Sirius walked in. "Did you guys find him?"

"No," Peter said sadly. "But I found his bag." He held it up.

"At least we know he was there," stated James. Peter tossed the bag onto Remus' bed and sat on his own and Sirius sat down where he was standing. James looked at Peter, "What's wrong with him?"

"I don't know. I found him on my way back." They both looked at the boy. Sirius was sitting there in his own little world.

James got up and moved next to Sirius. "What's wrong, Pads?"

Sirius looked up at James, "Sumer."

"Don't worry we'll find him." James' stomach rumbled. "Let's go to dinner. We'll see him there."

--

But they didn't. When they entered the Great Hall they all looked for him, but they saw their usual spot completely empty.

When Sirius saw the empty seats he whined.

"He's channeling Padfoot, again," said Peter.

James nodded his head and led Sirius to the table and sat him down. James sat next to him and Peter was across from them both. All throughout dinner the other two had to encourage Sirius to eat. Near the end of dinner Angela came over and sat next to Peter.

"What's wrong with him?"

Peter looked at her. "He and Remus got into a fight. Apparently some guy was hitting on Remus and asked him on a date."

Angela looked at Peter in shock, "What? And Sirius just let him." She looked at the down trodden boy. "How could you?! You're perfect together!"

James and Sirius both looked at her. "What are you talking about?"

She looked at James, "Oh, come on. You can't tell me that you've never noticed it? The way they look at each other? The way they act around one another? They're in love!"

"Sumer sekil enoemos esle," said Sirius.

"I don't care about whatever you just said," Angela had changed into an entirely different person. "You need to find him and apologize for whatever you did."

Sirius was about to protest but Angela stopped him. "I don't care if it's true or not. You and he need to talk."

Sirius looked at her and nodded. He shot up and ran out of the Great Hall.

James and Peter both stared at her. "What?"

Peter was the first to recover, "How did you know all that? You're a year below us."

Angela stood up, "Lily told me everything. She asked me to help. Bye" She waved and went back to her own table.

James and Peter looked down the table to Lily who just waved at them.

--

Remus was standing in front of the portrait. He didn't know if he should go in. Before he could make his mind up someone tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and smiled.

"Hi Remus."

"Hi Severus."

--

A/N 2: I'm going to stop there for now. So, how many of you are mad at me? But do not fear, there will be puppy happiness! Just not for another chapter…or two.

A/N 3: **The poll will be up until I post chapter 7. Then it comes down.**


	7. Remus!

A/N: Don't hate me!

Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. They be J.K.'s -sigh- I've invited them to tea, we're having a gay ol' time

--

"What are you doing down in the dungeons?" asked Snape.

"I can't face Sirius right now," Remus told him. "I don't think they'll look for me here."

"I see. Well, come in." Snape turned to the portrait and gave the password. It swung open and they entered the Slytherin common room.

"Why aren't you at dinner, Severus?" asked Remus when he placed the books on the table.

Snape sat down on one of the green couches, "I wasn't very hungry. I was going to do some homework and then I saw you." He looked at the books, "What are those for?"

Remus looked at the books as he sat next to Snape, "I'm going to solve Sirius' problem. I'm sick of translating everything for people."

Snape placed his hand on Remus' shoulder. "That must be hard on you. He came to me earlier and he had to actually spell his question out."

"What did he do to you?" asked a worried Remus, "Are you alright?"

"He raised his hands in surrender. He told me you guys got into a fight. Can I ask what it was about? As your friend."

Remus turned to Snape on the couch, who did the same. "You were right."

"I'm always right," he said. Then he raised an eyebrow, "About what?"

"About Sirius 'liking' me. He told me this afternoon after you and Angela left. Actually he precise words were, 'I think I like you'." Remus got up and started to pace the room.

Snape remained on the couch watching him. When Snape got bored of watching he asked, "Do you want help with the research?"

Remus stopped suddenly and looked at the books. "Yeah, I guess. If you don't mind." He walked over to the books and picked up the top one.

Snape got up and grabbed the next one, "Anything for a friend."

--

Sirius ran to the Gryffindor common room, hoping Remus was there. When he entered the room, however, it was empty.

'_Crap. Where is he?_' Sirius sat down on the red couch and waited for his friend to show up.

Other Gryffindors had come and gone in the last hour, but not Remus. While Sirius was staring at the fire the remaining Marauders showed up.

"Any luck?" asked James as he plopped down next to him.

"On," he answered, shaking his head.

Peter sat in a chair near them, "I guess he still needs to think it over."

Sirius felt a warm liquid on his cheek. When he went to wipe it away he realized that he was crying. '_Where is he?_'

"Are you crying?" asked Peter.

Sirius quickly wiped away the other tears, "On. Ym seye erew gnitaews."

James leaned in closer to Sirius, "You are!"

"TUHS PU!" Sirius launched at James, planting his hand over his mouth.

Lily entered the common room and saw Sirius trying to shut up James; she walked over to Peter.

"What are they doing?" she asked.

Peter looked up at her, "I'm not sure. Sirius started crying and James called him on it. Then this happened." He gestured to the two fighting boys.

"I see," she sat down on the arm of the chair and waited for them to notice her. James was the first to see her and stopped immediately.

When Sirius noticed this he looked up, "Snave."

"Black."

James looked at Sirius and then Lily. "You can understand him too?"

"No, but I can tell when I'm being addressed." She sat down on couch in between the two boys, she turned to Sirius. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head, "Gnihton."

"Don't lie to me. Ever since you got back from Hogsmeade you've been like this." She looked at James briefly. "And a little birdie told me you two got into a fight."

Sirius leaned past Lily and glared at James.

"What happened? What was the fight about?"

"You know you can't understand him, Lily," stated James.

She turned and gave him a mild glare. She looked back at Sirius, "Can Peter at least tell me what happened."

"Hey," cried James. "Why not me?"

Lily continued to look at Sirius, "Because."

"Because why?"

"Because I said so. So can Peter tell me?"

Sirius looked at Peter and nodded. She smiled and turned to the plump boy. James gave a huff and pouted against the couch back.

"Do you want the entire story or just the last bit?" asked Peter.

"It might help if I knew what happened," she said matter-of-factly.

"Ok. Yesterday Sirius was invited to go to Hogsmeade by Angela Combs. We all thought it was a date, but she just needed help buying a gift. Anyways, the day of the 'date' Remus was talking with Snape. James said he wanted Remus' help so Angela could understand him, but he really wanted her to get lost so they could have fun by themselves. But Remus invited Snape along so he could have someone to talk to. We hexed Snape to get him away and then Angela left them to have lunch. When they got there their waiter started chatting up Remus. Sirius got mad. The guy, Josh, asked Remus out but before he could answer Sirius told them was hungry. Josh left and then Sirius told Remus that he thought he liked him. Remus took it the wrong way; he said Sirius just didn't want him dating Josh. Remus left and now we can't find him." He looked at Sirius, "Did I miss anything?"

Sirius shook his head again.

"I see," Lily said. "Potter told me that you guys went looking for him, where did you go?"

James answered for them, "I went to look for you." When he saw the look she gave him he continued. "I thought you might know where he was. Pete went to the library and found his bag. Sirius went outside by the lake. We all met up here after words."

"On," interrupted Sirius. "I tnew ot eht Moor fo Tnemeriuqer." They all looked at him; he held up 7 fingers and stomped on the floor.

"7 stomp?" guessed Peter. Sirius shook his head and pointed to the floor.

"7 ground?" was James' guess. He shook his head again and pointed to the floor again.

"He's saying the seventh floor," said Lily. She looked at Sirius, "You went to the Room of Requirement?"

He nodded. "What did you see?" she asked. He gave his impression of Remus.

"You saw Moony and you didn't bring him back!?" cried James.

"Potter. Relax." Lily said, "I'm pretty sure if he saw Remus he would have told you." She turned back to Sirius. "The room gave you a fake Remus, right?"

He nodded his head. He then made a happy face and then laughed.

"He was happy and smiling. Why?"

He pointed to himself.

"You you or the room's you?"

He held up two fingers.

"Ok. So far you've told us that the fake Remus was laughing at something the fake you said. Correct?"

Sirius nodded then pointed to himself, shook his head, did his impression of Remus, held up two fingers, laughed, and then he made the gesture for Josh (writing on a pad of paper with flirty eyes).

James translated everything as it came up, "You. No. Remus. Two. Laugh. Josh."

Lily understood him, "You don't want Remus to laugh at what Josh says."

Sirius nodded and then pointed to himself a couple of times. "You want him to laugh at what you say only." Sirius nodded. "But don't you want him to be happy?"

"Sey."

"Couldn't he be happy with Josh?" asked Lily.

This time Sirius did nothing. He didn't make any hand gestures, he didn't try to talk. He just stared at the fire in front of him.

"That's what I thought," Lily stated. "You want Remus to be happy. But you don't want other people to make him happy." Sirius continued to stare at the flame but nodded his head.

"Let me ask you a question. When you think of Remus with someone else does your stomach hurt?" He nodded his head, thinking of earlier.

"When Remus was talking to…what was his name?" she looked at James.

"Uh…Josh," he was slightly stunned she addressed him.

"When Remus was talking to Josh did you want to kill him?"

Sirius lowered his gaze and blushed, and then nodded.

Lily got up and kneeled in front of Sirius. "When you think of him do you feel happy? Happier than anyone has ever made you feel? Are you happy when he's near you?"

Sirius looked her in the eye and nodded. They both heard Peter whisper, "What is she talking about?" to James.

"Shh! I'm listening to this."

She ignored them both and took Sirius hands in hers. "It seems to me that you're in love Sirius." She let go of his hands, stood up, and walked to the girl's dorm.

"Potter?" James turned around to face her.

"Yes, Lily-flower?" he said sweetly.

"20 points from Gryffindor for hexing Severus." He looked at her dumbfounded.

--

"I think I've got it," said Remus.

Snape placed the book he was looking at down on the table. He got up and moved so he could see what Remus had figured out. "So how do we reverse it?"

"You have to say the same spell," he looked up at Snape. "Don't you see? To Sirius' mind he's speaking correctly. You said 'Sermo Porro', which translated means: 'Talk Forward' but Sirius couldn't because he already was. At least, according to his brain. I guess to reverse it we have to say 'Sermo Tergiversatio' again."

"I guess that makes sense," said Snape. Remus turned to look at him and saw how close they had gotten.

Remus tried to scoot back but Snape kept getting closer. "Severus. What are you do-?"

But Remus was cut off by a pair of lips covering his own.

He quickly pushed Snape away and jumped out of his chair. He looked at him in horror. "What do you think you're doing?!" he yelled.

"I kissed you," Snape said calmly.

"I know that! But why?"

Snape moved forward and Remus moved back, "Because I like you."

Remus quickly grabbed the cloak and the map and rushed out of the Slytherin common room. When he thought he was a safe distance away he stopped and checked the map.

'_Everyone's in the common room._' And then his stomach growled. He checked the area around the kitchen and then made his way there.

--

When Remus was full he left the kitchen and made his way to the seventh floor. He wasn't sure if he was ready to see the others yet, so he made his way to the Room of Requirement.

'_Sirius was here earlier. I wonder what he needed._' Remus walked across three times thinking of a nice warm bed. When the door appeared he picked up the cloak and map and headed in.

The room looked just like the dorm room, except it was missing three other beds. Off to the side was another door.

He made his way there and found out it's the bathroom. '_The Room really knows what I need._'

Remus made his way over to the tub in the corner and turned on the water. When the tub was filled he got undressed and slipped in.

While he was submerged he thought about the day he had.

First: He gets wrangled into being Sirius' personal translator. '_At least it wasn't a real date. I'm not sure how I would of handled it if it was._'

Second: He meets this really nice guy who was going to ask him out. '_I'm not sure if I really would have said yes. It was just nice getting some attention._'

Third: Sirius had to go and prove Severus right. '_I'm his best friend (besides James), how did I not notice?_'

Fourth: Severus kissed him. '_I can't believe he did that to me. Friends don't do that._'

Remus sat up and thought about that. '_Just like me and Sirius. I'll go see Josh tomorrow and see if he still wants to go out with me._'

He got out of the bath and put on the pair of pj bottoms the room supplied him. He made his way over to the bed and crawled in. '_Hopefully I'll get a good night's sleep._'

--

James woke up the next morning to someone gently and repeatedly poking him.

"Whaaat?" he whined. He opened an eye and saw Sirius sitting pretzel style on his bed. Sirius then pointed to Remus' empty bed.

'_Wait. Empty?_' James put his glasses on and sat up. He looked at Sirius, who looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep.

After Lily left them with her little revelation Sirius spent most of the night thinking about what she said. Around 1 o'clock in the morning he came rushing in yelling, "S'EHS THGIR! I EVOL YNOOM!"

They finally got him settled down around 2 and James thought they all went to bed. "You didn't sleep, did you?"

Sirius yawned and shook his head. "Waiting up for him?"

Sirius nodded again, "Em ypeels." James ignored him and looked at the clock. It was 10, '_I guess I could get up._' James got out of bed and went to his trunk and grabbed some clothes. When he looked up he saw Sirius staring at him.

"Well either get Wormy up or get dressed." James went to the bathroom and a smile grew on Sirius' face. He jumped onto the other boy's bed and continued to do jump. Up and down, up and down.

"I'm up! I'm up!" cried Peter. He rolled out of bed and made his way to his own trunk and promptly fell back asleep. James walked out and saw the sleeping boy. He pointed to him and moved his fingers as if to tickle him.

Sirius sat down and watched the fun begin. James quietly made his way to Peter and started to tickle him. Peter yelped and jumped. He quickly turned into a rat and scurried under his bed.

"No fair!" yelled James. "You cheated!" He tried to crawl under there but couldn't fit. Sirius watched the entire scene from the safety of the bed.

While James was still searching for the rat, Wormtail changed back into Peter and tackled the taller boy. Sirius rolled his eyes and went to his own trunk and pulled out the small air horn James got him for Christmas last year, (he thought it would it would be fun to scare the first years with).

He pushed the button and the two boys stopped what they were doing and put their hands over their ears. They looked up at him from the ground and he pointed to his stomach. They rolled their eyes at him and Peter and Sirius got dressed.

James and Peter made jokes all the way to the Great Hall, Sirius was too busy thinking about…stuff.

They got their and made their way to their seats.

--

Remus woke up and looked at the clock. '_10 o'clock!_' He jumped out of bed and quickly got dressed. As he was running out the door he remembered the cloak and the map. He turned around and grabbed them.

He put them in his back pocket and ran to the Great Hall.

As he was entering the Hall he remembered why he didn't sleep in the dorms. There was Sirius sitting at the table. Remus just stood there for a moment staring at him.

--

Sirius had this weird feeling someone was staring at him. He looked up from his plate to see Remus standing in the doorway. He jumped up from his seat and rushed over to him. Sirius jumped at him and they both fell to the ground.

"I dessim uoy ooos hcum! M'i yrros. Os os yrros."

"Sirius?"

Sirius looked at the boy he was crushing. "Sey?"

"Can you get off me?"

Sirius shook his head, "On."

"Why not?"

Sirius snaked his arms around Remus' waist, "I dessim uoy os hcum!"

Remus blushed, "Can I at least get something to eat?"

"I sseeug." Sirius got up and held out his hand. Remus gladly took it.

'_At least he's back to normal. To an extent._'

Remus and Sirius sat across from Peter and James.

"So, Moony. Where were you last night?" asked James as he took a bite of his eggs.

He just stared at him, "Nowhere. Sirius! What are you doing?" Sirius had scooted closer and closer to Remus and was now practically sitting on him.

"Tahw?" Sirius wrapped his arm around Remus' neck to bring him closer.

Remus sighed, "Nevermind," he smiled.

Remus wiggled out of the Sirius' arms and they chatted for a few more minutes as the Great Hall started got more crowded. Soon Remus saw someone coming up behind James and Peter.

"Uh…Hello, Severus," greeted Remus.

Snape stopped and placed the books Remus left in the common room on the table. He walked away without looking behind him.

"What crawled up his butt and died?" asked Peter.

Remus just shrugged his shoulders.

Sirius looked at the book, "S'tahw htiw eht skoob?"

"Oh! I figured out how to get you back to normal." He gave Sirius a smile.

But Sirius was still looking at the books, "Yhw did eh evah eht skoob?" This time Sirius looked Remus in the eye.

"I…uh," Remus stammered. "You see. Severus was helping me with the research"

"Why didn't you ask for our help?" asked Peter.

"Because…I…um. I wasn't…uh…sure if you'd want to help."

James threw a piece of toast at him. "Quit stuttering. And you know we would have helped."

"S'taht ton yhw uoy t'ndid tnaw ruo pleh," said Sirius. "Uoy erew gnidiova em." Sirius grabbed Remus' arm and turned him towards him. "Yhw did uoy diova em?"

"I'd rather not talk about it, Siri." Remus tried to grab for the books but Sirius slammed his hand on them. Everyone around them turned to look.

"Llet em." He grabbed the still outstretched hand and pulled it close to him. "Esaelp?"

Remus looked at their hands and then at Sirius. "I don't want you to hate me."

Sirius pulled him into a tight embrace, "I dluoc reven etah uoy."

Remus hugged him back and said, "Severus told me you were bi and because you knew I was gay you'd try something on me. As an experiment. And then you said you liked me. It freaked me out because I thought what he said was true. I couldn't bear it if that happened."

Sirius pulled away and looked at Remus; he wiped away a tear that had fallen onto Remus' cheek. "I evah gnihtemos I deen ot llet uoy. Dna I 'tnod tnaw ot llet uoy ekil siht. Yas eht lleps."

Remus pulled away and nodded. He pulled out his wand and said, "Sermo Tergiversatio".

James, Peter, and Remus all looked at him.

"Well?" asked James. "Say something."

Sirius placed his hands on the sides of Remus' face, and looked him in the eye. "I love you." He pulled Remus' face to his own and pressed their lips together.

They pulled apart after a few seconds; Sirius wasn't sure how Remus was going to handle this. But when he looked at the boy he saw a huge smile.

"Really?" asked Remus.

"Really," answered Sirius.

"I love you, too," Remus said quietly. He was about to kiss Sirius again when Peter interrupted them.

"Ew, gross." Three heads turned to him.

Sirius looped his arms around Remus' neck, "What's wrong, Pete?"

Peter had a disgusted look on his face. "Are you two going to be doing that a lot?"

"Maybe…" was his only answer.

He rolled his eyes, "Great. You two are going to be as bad as James."

James punched him in the arm. "What are you talking about?"

Peter ignored him while rubbing his arm, "At least you guys will be all lovey-dovey and actually get some. Unlike James."

Remus and Sirius laughed at his joke while James hit him again.

"So, are the two love birds finally together?" They heard down the table.

"Looks like it. Pay up." All four heads looked down to see Angela giving Lily money.

Sirius shot up, "Hey!"

Both girls look at him, along with the rest of the hall. "What?" they both called out.

Sirius got on top of the table. "May I have the attention of everyone?"

"You've already got it, Pads," called James.

Ignoring his best friend, "I have an announcement: I, Sirius O. Black, am in love with Remus J. Lupin." He looked at the crowd, "That means no touchy my man." He bowed and sat down.

Remus looked at him."_Your_ man?"

"Yes. I have official claimed you," stated Sirius matter-of-factly.

Remus rolled his eyes and hugged Sirius close to him, "I guess that's fine," he then proceeded to kiss Sirius on the cheek.

"Hmm," sighed Sirius, "That felt nice. Do it again." Remus leaned in and kissed the same spot.

"Again." Remus was about to kiss him when Sirius turned his head. Their lips met and Remus' smiled.

"Cheater," he said against the other lips.

"Yes, but now I'm your cheater."

Sirius leaned in and pressed the lips together, he ran his tongue over Remus' lower lip asking for entrance, which he got. Their tongues met in Remus' mouth and fought for dominance, which Sirius soon won.

"Get a room," said James. Sirius and Remus pulled apart and looked at him.

"Fine," Sirius got up and pulled Remus with him. They left the Great Hall to finish what they had started.

--

Severus was walking to the Slytherin common room when he heard, "Sermo Tergiversatio!" He turned around to see Sirius and James looking at him with smug looks.

"KCALB! RETTOP!!"

James ran off but Sirius stayed. He walked up to Snape calmly and looked him in the eye, "If you ever kiss Remus again, you'll never have kids." He gave him an evil smile and turned and walked away.

'_I wonder what Remus is up too…_'

The End

--

A/N 2: That can't be the end -goes to notebook and flips through the pages- Omg, it is. My story is done. Wow. -shakes head- Anyways, I'd like to thank everyone who read/reviewed/alerted/favorited this story. Me and the puppy's thank all of you. I'm going to go do some homework right no- -gets tapped on the shoulder- Yes? Oh no! It's the plot alligator! And it wants me to write another story. Noooooo!

A/N 3: I wonder if anyone really reads these. Hmm… If anyone reads this I will write a one-shot of your choice. You pick the characters, plot, setting, and anything. Just drop me a line. I'll try my best. But that's only if you read this. And don't put it in review form, actually send me a message. Go to my profile and send me a personal message. Ok bye bye. For now.


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